Life’s too short to not have a happily ever after

by | Lindsey's Musings

February 2014

My birthday’s coming up, and I’m not sure what it is about birthdays-mine and others…I’m not THAT conceited;) but they always get me thinking. I’ve always loved birthdays… and to most people that’s kind of strange. No matter who’s birthday it is I love making things for people, being the first to wish them happy birthday, surprising, and making an all-around embarrassing big deal out of things.

To most I guess a birthday is just another day, no big deal, nothing too special. But to me, a birthday is a very big deal. I don’t mean throw me a huge party, give me everything I’ve ever wanted kind of big deal.That’s not what birthdays are about. I believe birthdays should be celebrated in their own special way. You should tell people you love them, think of the things you’ve accomplished in the previous year, and do something (big or small) just for you. Why? Because a birthday is a celebration of another year you’ve been blessed to live, and not everyone gets that.

So…obviously I’ve been thinking about the past couple of years and how much I’ve changed. I think it all started when I decided to move apartments, found a place, and practically signed the contract before I remembered “oh yeah….maybe I should call my dad and talk to him about this.” It is such a big change from my freshman year, where my parents practically walked me through finding a place to live.

I’ve also got to thinking about where my life is going. Thinking back to my High School days I had such a different plan for my life. But I look at who I am, what I’ve done, and where I’m going and I absolutely adore that my life has turned out the way it has. That brings me to my title…happily ever after.

There’s one funny thing about happily ever afters, and that’s the after. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good chick flick, guy gets the girl, fantasy fairy tale where everything happens just as it should. But, I feel like people get the wrong idea with happily ever after. Why? Because I used to be one of them.

The trick with happily ever after is people are always waiting for the after. After I lose 15 pounds I’ll be happy. After this semester things will be different and I’ll be happy. After I get married things will be better, that will make me happy. After I get out of debt I’ll be happy. After I get a new job, I’ll be happy. After I’m out of high school, surely…things will change and I will be happy.

I know people think like this because I used to. I was constantly saying to myself ‘after this things will be different and I’ll be happier.’ But folks, here’s the kicker. Life is full of knock-downs and drag-outs. Trials… they build character, they show people more about themselves than they ever knew, and they’re why we’re here.

So, my mom’s pretty sick. In January of 2013 when she first got sick I found myself miserably in the after stage. After chemotherapy was over, we’d all be happy. After the semester was over and it was summer I’d be happy. You know, in a way I was kind of right. I was happier when the semester came to an end, and my whole family had lighter moods when we finished the first round of chemo. But, I missed out on so many opportunities to be happy before.

It’s funny, how things kind of loop around-especially when there’s a lesson still to be learned. This January rolled around and what would you know? We’re doing the chemotherapy thing again. When I first found-out it rocked my world. The timing of almost a year to the date freaked me right out. I panicked and couldn’t help but selfishly feel like cancer would always be this cloud forever sucking the happiness from my family. We would miss another spring and summer as a normal family. Please, don’t judge me for the selfish thoughts I had. You really have no idea what cancer does to your mind.

But, here’s the good part. I had awesome people in my life and reflective moments where I realized I don’t want to continue the cycle. I don’t want to wait for my happily ever after. I have no idea how long we’re going to be fighting cancer, but I do know this. We are going to do it with big smiles on our faces, and we’re going to enjoy the ride. This isn’t the first trial my family has had, and it won’t be the last. That’s okay. In fact, I’m grateful for it. I’ve learned so much about myself, what I need, who I am and how to be happy.

Trials are there, it’s inevitable. But I believe for every trial in life there are at least 5 positive highlights to go with them. The trick is to look for the good. Appreciate the good news, embrace what is working, and find some sunshine in every day.

Yes, my mom is sick. Is it hard? Yes, it’s hard. But, I also have a lot of great things going for me. I have a church that gives me so much purpose, comfort and guidance. I have a God and Savior who know me better than I know myself. I have the opportunity to attend the best school for me and further my education. I have great friends and even better family. I have jobs and opportunities that miraculously keep crossing my path. I’m going to be an aunt again in June, a miracle I’m so incredibly grateful for. I am a very blessed girl, and I thank God for it.

*you’re probably sick of me talking about my mom’s cancer and how much I’ve learned from it. I can’t help it. I just feel the need to share what I’ve learned in hopes others can as well.*

So here’s the deal. You go ahead and believe in happily ever afters. Really, please do. But don’t get tripped up on the after. If I were to re-write history, I think I’d just leave it at happily ever…no after needed. You can have your happily ever after right now, right this day, right this second. It’s up to you to decide if you’re going to be happy. It’s up to you to make your life everything you’ve ever wanted. It’s up to you to seize the day.

Am I the best at this? No, not even close. I still have my “after” moments and I can occasionally get in a funk. But, I’m working on it.

“I’m proud of the person I’ve become, because I fought hard to become her” – Anonymous.

Extending God’s Mercy…Also Known As Minding Your Own Business

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Finding joy in the journey…through potholes, sink holes, and great crevasses

This is a post about relying on faith when job-hunting, and is hopefully relatable to recent college graduates.
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Life’s too short to live in fear

August seems like it was half a lifetime ago, but I can clearly remember how fearful my life was. In the last three months things got better, but they didn't necessarily get easier.
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Not Your Mama’s Gluten Free Mac & Cheese

The gluten-free life isn't always easy, especially when you're craving some serious comfort food. Like Mac n Cheese. Don't worry, I've got you covered!
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Gluten Free Almond Flour Banana Bread (Easy Guide)

[et_pb_section transparent_background="off" allow_player_pause="off" inner_shadow="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" padding_mobile="off" make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="off" custom_width_px="1080px" custom_width_percent="80%" make_equal="off" use_custom_gutter="off" fullwidth="on" specialty="off" admin_label="Section" disabled="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title title="on" meta="on" author="on" date="off" categories="on" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" admin_label="Post_Title" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_width="1px" border_style="solid" disabled="off" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section transparent_background="off" allow_player_pause="off" inner_shadow="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" padding_mobile="off" make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="off" custom_width_px="1080px" custom_width_percent="80%" make_equal="off" use_custom_gutter="off" fullwidth="off" specialty="off" admin_label="Section" disabled="off"][et_pb_row make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="off" custom_width_px="1080px" custom_width_percent="80%" use_custom_gutter="off" gutter_width="3" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" make_equal="off" column_padding_mobile="on" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="on" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="on" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="on" parallax_4="off" parallax_method_4="on" admin_label="Row" disabled="off"][et_pb_column type="1_4" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_number_counter number="31" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" admin_label="Number Counter" number_font="Lora||||" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_width="1px" border_style="solid" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" divider_weight="1px" hide_on_mobile="on" admin_label="Divider" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" admin_label="Text" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30" use_border_color="off" border_style="solid" disabled="off"] March 2019 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_text background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" admin_label="Text" use_border_color="off" border_style="solid" disabled="off"]

Here's my latest recipe for easy gluten free banana bread using almond flour.

  • Ingredients:

    • 1 cup almond flour
    • 1 1/2 - 2 mashed ripe bananas
    • 1 egg
    • 1 tsp vanilla
    • 1/8 tsp ground cinnamon
    • 1/8 tsp nutmeg
    • generous helping of chocolate chips
    • 1 tbls of butter or butter replacement
    • 1 tsp baking soda
    • 1/8 tsp salt
    • 1 tsp lemon juice
    • 2 small bread pans or 1 large bread pan
    • coconut oil
    • 1/8 cup oats (optional)- if you do add oats, be sure to add at least 2 ripe bananas so the texture of the bread isn't dry
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="off" custom_width_px="1080px" custom_width_percent="80%" use_custom_gutter="off" gutter_width="3" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" make_equal="off" column_padding_mobile="on" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="on" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="on" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="on" parallax_4="off" parallax_method_4="on" admin_label="Row" disabled="off"][et_pb_column type="3_4" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_image src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/DSC_0178.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" sticky="off" align="left" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" admin_label="Image" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_width="1px" border_style="solid" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_4" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_text background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" admin_label="Text" text_font="|||on|" text_font_size="30" use_border_color="off" border_style="solid" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_text][et_pb_text background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" admin_label="Text" text_font="||on||" use_border_color="off" border_style="solid" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="off" custom_width_px="1080px" custom_width_percent="80%" use_custom_gutter="off" gutter_width="3" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" make_equal="off" column_padding_mobile="on" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="on" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="on" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="on" parallax_4="off" parallax_method_4="on" admin_label="Row" disabled="off"][et_pb_column type="4_4" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="on" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_text background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" admin_label="Text" use_border_color="off" border_style="solid" disabled="off"]
  • Directions:

  • Preheat oven to 350* F
  • Coat your pans with a generous amount of coconut oil (I like to spread it on with a paper towel so it's even)
  • Combine almond flour, (optional) oats, cinnamon, nutmeg, baking soda and salt in a bowl
  • Add the lemon juice, vanilla and egg and stir
  • After mashing bananas in a separate bowl, stir those in as well
  • The final touch is adding as many chocolate chips as you like (I go for the generous side of things)
  • Pour batter into one large bread pan, or split evenly between the two small (batter should be 1/2-3/4 the way up the smaller bread pans. If using a larger bread pan spread it more thinly so the inside can cook as well.)
  • Bake at 350* F for 50-55 minutes or until a toothpick can be inserted into the middle of the loaf and removed cleanly. Cooking time may be shorter if you use multiple smaller bread pans.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" column_padding_mobile="on" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" admin_label="Row" disabled="off" global_module="3581"][et_pb_column type="1_3" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_post_slider posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" excerpt_length="270" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" use_text_overlay="on" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_speed="7000" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" text_border_radius="3" admin_label="Post Slider" body_font_size="20" meta_font_size="16px" meta_letter_spacing="0" meta_line_height="1em" custom_button="off" button_text_size="20" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_post_slider posts_number="3" include_categories="8,6" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" excerpt_length="270" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_speed="7000" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" text_border_radius="3" admin_label="Post Slider" body_font_size="20" meta_font_size="16px" meta_letter_spacing="0" meta_line_height="1em" custom_button="off" button_text_size="20" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3" disabled="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_post_slider posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" excerpt_length="270" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_speed="7000" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" text_border_radius="3" admin_label="Post Slider" body_font_size="20" meta_font_size="16px" meta_letter_spacing="0" meta_line_height="1em" custom_button="off" button_text_size="20" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" disabled="off"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
Read Me

Gluten Free Cheesy Potatoes

[et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="off" date="off" categories="off" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="3" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] May 2017 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/20170402_155350.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="left" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="|||on|" text_font_size="30"] Gluten free cheesy potatoes. Also known as heaven. 🙂 [/et_pb_text][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="||on||"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] Prep: 15 Minutes Cook time: 1-1.5 hours Serves 2-4 people What You Need: 2 tblspns gluten free flour/mix (Enjoy Life, Arrow Root) 2 tblspns butter (or ghee) 2 Cups Milk 4-6 small potatoes sliced 2 cups of cheese of choice (I use sharp cheddar) 1 pinch garlic salt 1 pinch onion powder Pepper to taste Casserole dish (most sizes will work)   In a small sauce pan melt the butter on low heat, stirring in gluten free flour. Whisk it well or until there are no longer any clumps, slowly adding in the milk. Leaving it on low heat, bring it to a slow boil before gradually stirring in the cheese.   Put down one layer of potatoes in casserole dish and layer with sauce. Repeat until you have desired casserole depth (it will vary depending on the pan). Make sure all the potatoes are covered with sauce and place in the oven.   I suggest baking it at 350* for one hour and then increments of 5-10 minutes after that until the desired texture is obtained. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" global_module="3581" make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on" custom_padding="25px|25px|25px|25px"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="8,6" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="off" date="off" categories="off" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="23" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] May 2015 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] We’re in one heck of a fight, yeah you got that right. With the ring of a bell, headed into what some call our personal Hell. It’s routine now, chemo, sleep, repeat. How many rounds is this? Good question, we count birthdays and chocolate bars around here. This year it started in November, as far as I can remember. A break from chemo, but hardly a break from the fight. Our regular cocktails weren’t giving a good enough buzz Shhh, not that kind of cocktail-no need to call the fuzz. December rolled around, We did our best to deck the halls. Surgery with the doc, coming up on number two. Jimmy made himself known, said ‘doc sir, you get this right.’ I guess a liver’s pretty important; at least that’s what they said. According to Jimmy, not as important as his little Lizzie, ‘she is my wife’. Huntsman became our hang-out, and despite all the casseroles- we ordered plenty of take-out. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" disabled="off" disabled_on="on|on|off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/nephews_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Christmas_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/postsx_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] Lizzie was brave, obeying the doc’s orders. In a room without her family, but not completely alone. No anesthesia today, although there was hardly a hooray. She held her breath, swallowed her fear, and let the chemo beads roam. The doc’s hands were steady, everything was ready. A surgery more precise than any before, one bead placed, two beads, and more. Her family waited two sets of heavy doors away, heavenly angels held her hands. “Be brave,” they whispered, “stay strong. God understands.” One successful surgery later, we’re not sure who was more relieved-Jimmy or the doc. Cancer and vertigo ruled our party, making most driving licenses invalid. Chauffer Lindsey and the Subie to the rescue. Who thought of buying the clutch anyway, those U of U hills are madness. Back home to Kamas, casseroles and chicken noodle soup waiting. Two cute little kiddos, grandma’s home soon to be invading. Cheers to a Christmas, and a New Year too. The doc said no more chemo, rest your tired head and renew. January and February rolled right along. Like the rest of the world, our days got busy. Two degrees to pursue, one to finish. Two little boys to raise, and crime to diminish. A classroom of kids to teach, for everyone has to learn math. And boy did the cancer grow back fast. March came with a bang, but Lizzie was still under the weather. The toughest trooper we know, but could this be her time to go? A trip to Huntsman’s acute care clinic, fighting cancer can have its perks. A cancer scan, emergency day-after chemo, and no more teaching math. Not the way we wanted it to go, but only God sees our path. It’s now the end of May and we’ve been plugging away. Lizzie’s strength is back, her cocktail as strong as ever. She’s getting closer to being out from under the weather. As far as we know, everything so far so good. We appreciate the love, and from me personally, the five-star food. Your creamy soups sure know how to change a person’s mood. We’ve got a scan coming up, we’re nervous-duh. But we’ve got a little something more on our side. No matter how long we do this, 3 years has been the ride, We testify God lives and loves us enough to send his son to die. Cancer’s scary-it’s a bully, it’s a threat. But it’s also lessons to be learned and people to be met. It’s forgiveness, and love, and growing up real fast. It’s looking to the future instead of being so tied to the past. We don’t have the answers, so there’s no point in the questions. How ‘bout a hug, a smile, or maybe a joke? If we talk about cancer anymore, we may have to choke. God has the answers, this is his game. Please, we don’t want to be thrown into fame. We just want to live, to love, and to learn. For simplicity, normality, and the shadows we yearn. We’ve been ever blessed, we could never say thank you enough. You all need to remember, at the end of the day Lizzie is still tough. We’ll keep our cocktails for now, and we’ll pray for a trial. Not the kind we have now, but a clinical, please no denial. 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Read Me

A for honesty….or I mean eventual honesty.

Stop faking it. Be genuine human beings. Stand up for what you believe in. Quit caring so much about others and take the time to care for yourself. In reality, by caring for yourself and telling the truth, you're taking better care of them anyways.
Read Me

Life’s too short to not have a nickname

Maybe it's because nicknames to me are a stepping stone. Feeling comfortable enough around someone to start giving them a nickname is a pretty big deal. It means you're friends. And not just the head nod, wave in public because you have to friends either.
Read Me

I’ve decided to try to be a poet

One of my closest friends in the whole wide world is an absolutely brilliant poet. After begging her to read me one of the most beautiful pieces I've ever heard, (which she wrote), I asked why she wrote poetry.
Read Me