Life’s too short to not have a nickname

by | Lindsey's Musings

December 2013

Hello again! Lucky you, I guess this post means I’ve managed to keep myself from deleting this blog for 24 hours. I can’t make any promises though:) So….nicknames, everybody has them. Let me tell you a story about my two most favorite nicknames.

My first nickname is bugs, and you see this nickname is reserved for pretty special people. No offense, it just is. It’s the nickname I remember having the longest, and there’s quite an interesting story to go along with it.

I was born two months prematurely. Due date May 15, (that’s my sister’s birthday. God must have known that while we’re totally capable of sharing things, we definitely would not have enjoyed it) born March 1. If you know me pretty well, or you’ve driven with me you know I can have a pretty short fuse. I’m also a chip off the old block. Both sides of my dad’s family are well known for their tempers. Snyders are particularly independent and sassy, while Pages are notorious for their hot heads and stubborn ways. So….I was born this tiny package of TNT, or maybe more like nitroglycerin. Anyways, apparently I was a pretty impatient baby. When I decide I want something, I go for it, and you better believe I’ll get there no matter what. Well, I decided I’d had enough of the easy life and wanted to be born NOW. Born a fighter, I fought hard alongside my mom for a few months in the hospital.

Because I was so premature I was a little bit of a smaller baby….and child…..and human being (ok…so I’m just looking for an excuse to be this short). My parents bought the smallest diapers known to mankind, and they of course drowned my skinny little butt. But, my mother made the best of it and just strapped it on really tight.

 

The story goes, (and trust me it’s one of my favorites) that I was quite the determined little kid- you never would have guessed right? 😉 I was home, and quite a few months old but just barely wearing newborn diapers. My mom would strap these oversize diapers on me and I would go crawling around like I was ready to own the world. They were so big they poofed out like a cotton ball and made me look like a little bug with an over-sized butt. My Uncle Tom, known for his humorous streak, proclaimed me ‘bugs’, and what do you know it stuck? While it was a little more popular when I was younger, it’s still a fond nickname.

My second nickname, and my favorite, is Lins. I remember very distinctly who gave me this nickname. *Drum roll please* Ms. Calee Lott you are the winner. I grew-up and ran around the river bottoms climbing trees with this outgoing, crazy, fun girl with such beautiful blonde hair we all called her blondie. Blondie gave me my nickname in elementary school, and it is probably my most favorite. Thanks Blondie:) I love ya!

I don’t know why this is so tender to me, but it just is. Maybe it’s because nicknames to me are a stepping stone. Feeling comfortable enough around someone to start giving them a nickname is a pretty big deal. It means you’re friends. And not just the head nod, wave in public because you have to friends either. It’s the real deal. The, ‘hey I actually care about this particular human being and want to spend time with them’ kind of friend. It’s a connection, a way to make your friendship mean a little more. Disclaimer: if I don’t call you a nickname, don’t think you’re a head nod kind of friend. I love all my friends and care about each of you as human beings:) Promise. I just suck at coming up with nicknames.

AND….secret confession time. I LOVE LOVE LOVE-like can’t tell you how much I love- and absolutely adore being called Lins. My face lights up like a Christmas tree, my heart does a little flip *mostly when it’s a cute boy who says it. Don’t judge, I can’t help it* 🙂 and puts a smile on my face. My roommates give me crap all the time for this. They probably think it’s creepy, someone calls me Lins and I just stand there smiling at them like a blithering idiot. I promise, it’s not in a weird day-dream sort of way. I’m honestly just flattered that we’re that great of friends.

While those are only two of my nicknames, I assure you I have many many more. I think I’ll save those for another day though. But, think about you now. What do nicknames mean to you? Do they mean anything? What’s your oldest nickname you can remember? Who gave it to you? If you can remember, go chat them up a little-ya know take a walk down memory lane. You’ll find it’s actually quite fun:)

-Lins

This I Believe

I could never ever in my life deny that God lives. He lives, he loves us, he knows us, and he is here to help us. It is my belief that when we left our Father in heaven to come to Earth and carry out his plan that he made us a few promises. Of those promises, I believe he promised a great life. He never promised a life with-out trials, but he promised us a great life indeed.
Read Me

When Satan Tells You It Will Never Be Enough

[et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="off" date="off" categories="off" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="26" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] May 2017 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] God and I have been having some pretty interesting chats lately. Mostly it’s been me spilling my guts, the ramblings of my brain, the fears from the deepest parts of my soul, and the constant begging for the slightest hint of relief. Relief from things that many people in this world cry out for relief from, and boy did I cry. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/DSC_0728.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="left" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="|||on|" text_font_size="30"] [/et_pb_text][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="||on||"] He asks us to trust ourselves, trust in the divine potential we had in heaven and brought with us. We didn’t lose it. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] I am so grateful for the atonement, so incredibly grateful. It is such a vast divine truth that I hope someday to be able to fully comprehend at the level it is intended to be comprehended at. It provides relief from sin—and the guilt, shame, blame, and fear associated with it. However, it is also so much more than relief from sin (although, that’s a pretty big part in and of itself). It’s a way to transform ourselves, to move us forward to the divine beings God intended us to be. It provides a safe haven from the storm, a strong hand to hold steady to, a reassurance that we are loved beyond measure, and so so so much more. I knew this then, and I know it now, but what I’ve always struggled with is the actual application.   So here I was, on my knees, begging for forgiveness, begging for relief, begging to feel worthy to even be called a daughter of God again. I was working through pain I had caused myself, others, and vice versa. I was muddling through mistakes years ago and some a little more recent. I was dealing with the knowledge that I hadn’t and wasn’t living up to my divine potential. I was trudging through the disappointment I felt in myself. All the while these nasty, negative emotions swirled around in me, and I couldn’t get them to leave.   I would sit at work and think over and over about how much of a failure I was. I would drive home and the thoughts of failure would drive home with me. I remembered every.little.mistake I had ever made, even years ago, and felt the sting and pain of being human with each and every one. I believed (and still do) in the atonement, but I just couldn’t see how that would work for me. I didn’t see how I could ever confess enough, plead for forgiveness, or ever do enough to qualify for complete peace.   I couldn’t see how I could possibly be forgiven for the mistakes I made. I couldn’t see how I could possibly do enough to make up for my shortcomings. Let me repeat that again, I could not see how I could do enough…ever. I had done the Godly sorrow thing, but I was having a bit of trouble bouncing back from it. I was stuck in a deep hole, a pit of despair you could call it, and I couldn’t see any way out. I jumped, I clawed, I begged, and prayed for a way out, but alas there I was at the bottom still.   I was trying everything I knew how to do. I went to church, I prayed, I read scriptures, I fasted, I talked with close friends, I talked with family, I talked with people I knew were supposed to help me. No one had the answer. No one had the one step trick to letting go and letting Christ take it for you. They all just kept telling me to draw closer to the spirit and keep praying, so I did.   Then, one day all my efforts just clicked into place. I realized exactly where the thought of “it will never be enough” was coming from, and I sent it straight back. You see, we couldn’t possibly ever do enough to make up for our mistakes because we don’t have to. It isn’t our responsibility to save ourselves and the world, that’s Christ’s job. He is the Redeemer and Savior of the world, not you and definitely not me.   I realized that Christ had heard the pleadings of my heart and was oh so willing to take every last drop of pain I would let him. I learned to trust him and to trust in his guiding hand to help me let go of the things I thought I possibly couldn’t. I learned to let him fill in the gaps with his perfect love and mercy. I let him pay every debt.   Christ doesn’t require us to be perfect to be worthy of his atonement. He doesn’t require us to be perfect to be worthy of his love. He just asks us to try, to be honest, to do the things we know we need to do in order to let the atonement work in our lives. He asks us to keep trying, to block Satan out of our minds—even if that means casting him out multiple times a day, and keep trying. He asks us to trust ourselves, trust in the divine potential we had in heaven and brought with us. We didn’t lose it. We were and still are sons and daughters of God, even if it’s a little hard to remember exactly what that entails at times.   Don’t ever let Satan tell you that your efforts couldn’t possibly be enough. Hit your knees, ask God for the companionship of the Holy Ghost, ask him to help you right your wrongs, get up, and get to work. I promise you that it’s okay that you will ‘never be enough’ because Christ already is. He’s done it, he’s paid the price, and he’s just waiting for you to say “okay Lord, here, take it.”   The best part is he will, I promise you with all the energy of my soul, he will.   "But behold, the Lord hath redeemed my soul from hell; I have beheld his glory, and I am encircled about eternally in the arms of his love."- 2 Nephi 1:15 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" global_module="3581" make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on" custom_padding="25px|25px|25px|25px"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="8,6" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="section"][et_pb_row admin_label="row"][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
Read Me

It’s Been Three Years

[et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="on" date="off" categories="on" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="11" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] August 2018 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] Dear Mom, It's been three years, and by some divine miracle, I have realized I'm happy again. I think of you often mom, I always will. Lately I've been thinking about what I've learned the last 3 years. I know you have people that need you, you always have, but can you stay long enough for me to tell you about them? I give all credit to God, and I am thankful beyond words. 1- God really does want us to be happy, even after he asks us to do hard things for him. I'm not talking just existing with a few pleasant experiences happy, but bubbling over to the brim with joy. 2- God puts people in our paths exactly when we need them. I can't even begin to tell you the people I've met mom, although I'm sure you already know--maybe even had a hand in my meeting them? Thank you then, because they've all been the sweetest blessing. 3- Time heals wounds we can't heal ourselves. I honestly didn't know if I would ever get my innocence -- , the freedom to be joyful, my easy smile and sparkling eyes -- all of that pure happiness back. You left a hole mom, and it was pretty dang impossible to fill. I think it wasn't mine to fill in the first place. Maybe God needed me to quit trying so hard and just let it be so he could slowly fill it as I was ready? 4-Life can be so much fun. Nothing has gone the way I planned it to go mom, but I am so glad it didn't!  I love my families: my work family, my ward family, my Orem family, my blood family, all of it. Maybe I'll quit making so many plans, God's always include more fun anyways. 5- The Gospel is true and it is oh so good. Thank you mom, for raising me the way you did. Thank you for patiently loving me when I was such a bratty teenager, and letting me find my testimony on my time and terms. This is the greatest gift you could have given me, the beginning of my knowledge of the Gospel and God's love for everyone. 6- Moving on doesn't mean forgetting, masking, pushing it aside, letting go, or brushing it under the rug. Moving on means moving forward with it, recognizing the pain when it is there but also recognizing the joy that comes right along with it. This life is so good mom, I feel so blessed to still be here to live it. I want to help them mom, the others. The 19-year-old kids who are scared out of their minds, realizing for the first time in their lives their parents are mortal. I want to help the 30-year-old adults, with kids of their own, wondering how on earth they can be a happy parent when they are forced to lose one of their one. And mom, oh mom, I want to help the little ones too. I want to help the young kids, the ones whose smiles will be a little too strained a little too early. I want them to know they can have their youth, their innocence, their energy back. I'm just not quite sure how I'm supposed to do all of that. The sunflowers are out mom, they're beautiful like always. They still remind me of you, every single time. I tell other people mom, about how happy they are and if a flower could give hugs, a sunflower would. I love you mom. I'll see you again sometime, but for now I've got a whole big life ahead of me, and I am happy I get to live it. Love, Lindsey [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" global_module="3581" make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on" custom_padding="25px|25px|25px|25px"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="8,6" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="section"][et_pb_row admin_label="row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
Read Me

Not Your Mama’s Gluten Free Mac & Cheese

The gluten-free life isn't always easy, especially when you're craving some serious comfort food. Like Mac n Cheese. Don't worry, I've got you covered!
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Gluten Free Cake Pops That Will Make You Wish You were actually gluten free

These cake pops will definitely be my go-to gluten free treat for future parties, events, and every day occasions... they were a hit!
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Gluten Free Cheesy Potatoes

[et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="off" date="off" categories="off" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="3" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] May 2017 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/20170402_155350.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="left" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="|||on|" text_font_size="30"] Gluten free cheesy potatoes. Also known as heaven. 🙂 [/et_pb_text][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="||on||"] [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] Prep: 15 Minutes Cook time: 1-1.5 hours Serves 2-4 people What You Need: 2 tblspns gluten free flour/mix (Enjoy Life, Arrow Root) 2 tblspns butter (or ghee) 2 Cups Milk 4-6 small potatoes sliced 2 cups of cheese of choice (I use sharp cheddar) 1 pinch garlic salt 1 pinch onion powder Pepper to taste Casserole dish (most sizes will work)   In a small sauce pan melt the butter on low heat, stirring in gluten free flour. Whisk it well or until there are no longer any clumps, slowly adding in the milk. Leaving it on low heat, bring it to a slow boil before gradually stirring in the cheese.   Put down one layer of potatoes in casserole dish and layer with sauce. Repeat until you have desired casserole depth (it will vary depending on the pan). Make sure all the potatoes are covered with sauce and place in the oven.   I suggest baking it at 350* for one hour and then increments of 5-10 minutes after that until the desired texture is obtained. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" global_module="3581" make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on" custom_padding="25px|25px|25px|25px"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" 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parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="on" specialty="off"][et_pb_fullwidth_post_title admin_label="Post_Title" global_module="142" saved_tabs="all" title="on" meta="on" author="off" date="off" categories="off" comments="off" featured_image="on" featured_placement="background" parallax_effect="on" parallax_method="on" text_orientation="center" text_color="light" text_background="on" text_bg_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" module_bg_color="rgba(255,255,255,0)" title_font="Montserrat|||on|" title_font_size="30" title_text_color="#ffffff" title_all_caps="off" meta_font="Lora||||" meta_text_color="#d9d8c7" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_fullwidth_post_title][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="Section" fullwidth="off" specialty="off"][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="1_4"][et_pb_number_counter admin_label="Number Counter" number="23" percent_sign="off" counter_color="#b54c60" background_layout="light" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" number_font="Lora||||"] [/et_pb_number_counter][et_pb_divider admin_label="Divider" color="#575a5e" show_divider="on" height="3" divider_style="solid" divider_position="top" hide_on_mobile="on"] [/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="center" header_font="Montserrat|||on|" header_font_size="42px" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid" text_font="Montserrat|||on|" text_font_size="30"] May 2015 [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="3_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] We’re in one heck of a fight, yeah you got that right. With the ring of a bell, headed into what some call our personal Hell. It’s routine now, chemo, sleep, repeat. How many rounds is this? Good question, we count birthdays and chocolate bars around here. This year it started in November, as far as I can remember. A break from chemo, but hardly a break from the fight. Our regular cocktails weren’t giving a good enough buzz Shhh, not that kind of cocktail-no need to call the fuzz. December rolled around, We did our best to deck the halls. Surgery with the doc, coming up on number two. Jimmy made himself known, said ‘doc sir, you get this right.’ I guess a liver’s pretty important; at least that’s what they said. According to Jimmy, not as important as his little Lizzie, ‘she is my wife’. Huntsman became our hang-out, and despite all the casseroles- we ordered plenty of take-out. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" make_fullwidth="off" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" disabled="off" disabled_on="on|on|off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/nephews_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/Christmas_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_image admin_label="Image" src="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/postsx_fight.jpg" show_in_lightbox="off" url_new_window="off" use_overlay="off" animation="left" sticky="off" align="center" force_fullwidth="off" always_center_on_mobile="on" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] [/et_pb_image][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row"][et_pb_column type="4_4"][et_pb_text admin_label="Text" background_layout="light" text_orientation="left" use_border_color="off" border_color="#ffffff" border_style="solid"] Lizzie was brave, obeying the doc’s orders. In a room without her family, but not completely alone. No anesthesia today, although there was hardly a hooray. She held her breath, swallowed her fear, and let the chemo beads roam. The doc’s hands were steady, everything was ready. A surgery more precise than any before, one bead placed, two beads, and more. Her family waited two sets of heavy doors away, heavenly angels held her hands. “Be brave,” they whispered, “stay strong. God understands.” One successful surgery later, we’re not sure who was more relieved-Jimmy or the doc. Cancer and vertigo ruled our party, making most driving licenses invalid. Chauffer Lindsey and the Subie to the rescue. Who thought of buying the clutch anyway, those U of U hills are madness. Back home to Kamas, casseroles and chicken noodle soup waiting. Two cute little kiddos, grandma’s home soon to be invading. Cheers to a Christmas, and a New Year too. The doc said no more chemo, rest your tired head and renew. January and February rolled right along. Like the rest of the world, our days got busy. Two degrees to pursue, one to finish. Two little boys to raise, and crime to diminish. A classroom of kids to teach, for everyone has to learn math. And boy did the cancer grow back fast. March came with a bang, but Lizzie was still under the weather. The toughest trooper we know, but could this be her time to go? A trip to Huntsman’s acute care clinic, fighting cancer can have its perks. A cancer scan, emergency day-after chemo, and no more teaching math. Not the way we wanted it to go, but only God sees our path. It’s now the end of May and we’ve been plugging away. Lizzie’s strength is back, her cocktail as strong as ever. She’s getting closer to being out from under the weather. As far as we know, everything so far so good. We appreciate the love, and from me personally, the five-star food. Your creamy soups sure know how to change a person’s mood. We’ve got a scan coming up, we’re nervous-duh. But we’ve got a little something more on our side. No matter how long we do this, 3 years has been the ride, We testify God lives and loves us enough to send his son to die. Cancer’s scary-it’s a bully, it’s a threat. But it’s also lessons to be learned and people to be met. It’s forgiveness, and love, and growing up real fast. It’s looking to the future instead of being so tied to the past. We don’t have the answers, so there’s no point in the questions. How ‘bout a hug, a smile, or maybe a joke? If we talk about cancer anymore, we may have to choke. God has the answers, this is his game. Please, we don’t want to be thrown into fame. We just want to live, to love, and to learn. For simplicity, normality, and the shadows we yearn. We’ve been ever blessed, we could never say thank you enough. You all need to remember, at the end of the day Lizzie is still tough. We’ll keep our cocktails for now, and we’ll pray for a trial. Not the kind we have now, but a clinical, please no denial. [/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][et_pb_row admin_label="Row" global_module="3581" make_fullwidth="on" use_custom_width="off" width_unit="on" use_custom_gutter="off" padding_mobile="off" allow_player_pause="off" parallax="off" parallax_method="off" make_equal="off" parallax_1="off" parallax_method_1="off" parallax_2="off" parallax_method_2="off" parallax_3="off" parallax_method_3="off" column_padding_mobile="on" custom_padding="25px|25px|25px|25px"][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="7" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="8,6" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][et_pb_column type="1_3"][et_pb_post_slider global_parent="3581" admin_label="Post Slider" posts_number="3" include_categories="9" orderby="rand" show_arrows="on" show_pagination="on" show_more_button="on" more_text="Read Me" content_source="off" use_manual_excerpt="on" show_meta="off" background_image="http://understandinglindsey.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/Jan_Erik_Wader.jpg" background_layout="dark" show_image="on" image_placement="background" parallax="on" parallax_method="off" use_bg_overlay="off" bg_overlay_color="rgba(217,216,199,0.73)" use_text_overlay="on" remove_inner_shadow="off" background_position="default" background_size="default" auto="off" auto_ignore_hover="off" hide_content_on_mobile="off" hide_cta_on_mobile="off" show_image_video_mobile="off" meta_letter_spacing="0" custom_button="off" button_letter_spacing="0" button_use_icon="default" button_icon_placement="right" button_on_hover="on" button_letter_spacing_hover="0" body_font_size="20" text_overlay_color="rgba(87,90,94,0.59)"] [/et_pb_post_slider][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section][et_pb_section admin_label="section"][et_pb_row admin_label="row"][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
Read Me

When you think you’re done, go back one more time.

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